The Cure for the Monday Blues

Sorry for not blogging Friday through Sunday its getting so hard for me to just find the time. I think Im just going to keep it as a Monday through Friday thing because it always seems that I have something major, or alot going on over the weekend. Friday night after I came home from school Muffin was transferred to Port Lavaca so I only had a couple of hours with him before he had to leave. After getting off school and getting home at learly 11pm I was super tired so we just laid down and held eachother for those few short hours we had together. I passed out and when I woke up I just cried and cried and cried because he left while I was sleeping. Omg it hurt so much to wake up alone and know that I wasnt going to see him for awhile so I cried and I cried hard. So I really wasnt in the mood for anything at all especially blogging. Being a full time  student and having a full time job really sucks the life out of you. I was so exhausted this weekend all I really wanted to do was lounge around and just be lazy but I had to get stuff done.  I also had my little sister this weekend which made things alot harder for me. She is way to energetic and I just couldnt keep up. I really just wanted to lounge and she wanted to go go go so it sucked.
I know that this weekend Im going to go to my Aunts 40th birthday and then its just going to be me time. I have no energy for anything else and I dont have any money to be spending so Im probably just going to rest, catch up on tv, jog, and rest some more.

Ok so now for a list of things I am loving today and keeping me going on this foggy, dreary Monday morning. Im really in need of some Christian time and I have a feeling that this weekend is going to be just that. Ugh some good ole Girly Christian Renee alone relaxation time!!!

-Missing Muffin and just thinking about all the fun and great things we do together, he really is my best friend and I love him so much
- Private one hour massage in the comfort of your own home. :) oh yea thats what Im talking about I didnt get one this weekend but I for sure am getting one next weekend
-Pedicures mmmm I totally want to get one soon with a nice glass of wine and a massage chair. Oh yes this will definitely help me destress. Maybe this weekend. I need to get me a good magazine or a good book and just go
-Chick flicks oh God how I love a good romantic comedy. I need to go see one but there arent any good ones. Im thinking this weekend Im going to rent bridemaids and open up a bottle of wine and just chill out
-Running, I may not be running fully but Im jogging and let me tell ya, it feels amazing. I went jogging this weekend 3 miles and my body is so sore but it feels good.
-Sleeping in, I will totally be doing this one
-Eating more fruits and drinking more water. I love what this is doing for my body and I love that Im in love with all the tastes of all the different fruits
-Aveda, last week was my first week of school and Ive learned so much about our philosophy and our products and Ive fallen in love eith it all. I can wait to get something done to my hair with our products and the best part is I get 50% off all services and 45% off all products for the first month :) I will definitely be using this soon
-Losing weight, after this weekend and seeing just what I kind do with my body at the weight I am right now I cant wait to lose the extra person of fat I have living inside of me and get out there and strengthen my body to its full potential.
Im definitely going to make this week a good one and I will leave the stress away from me because I never want to be in that amount of pain again. I want to be the best  me I can be and this weekend was a sneak peek and Im excited.


Well I will talk to you guys later :) Have a good Monday everyone

The Wonderful life of Cupcake and Muffin

Well Guys this past week is what we are all wondering about. What the hell has gotten into Christian and wow she really is back lol. I know its what you are all thinking. I mean there really wasn't a point not to get back into it. I mean I loved it, it took my mind off of things while I was typing and it also took a lot of things off of my chest so why not. I love writing, I may not be very good at it but I love it. I have kept a journal for about 5 years now and I love it. Writing really helps me out with stress and depression and to me its worth it even if I do suck lol. I guess what I want to talk about is what the hell is going on with me as of right now health wise and also let you know what went on this week that I didn't right about in each weekly post.  Now on to my story...

So coming back to blogging wasn't hard at all I kind of focused more on some of the good things that were happening in my life, although there wasn't much. I mean I had Muffin, he was a big help with his advice and all his love and support, there was also my weight loss which motivated me alot but there were alot of other things happening that kept trying to crunch me down and keep me down.
The problems I was having were at Chuy's omg I am so happy I didn't quit my "real" job to work full time at that shit hole. I know that I said I hated my day job but dealing with people pretending to be your friend and then talking shit behind your back and being fake pretentious assholes really takes you back to the dark side of high school. When I left high school I was happy leaving that bullshit behind I mean seriously we are all adults here come the fuck on. At my day job shit really wasn't as bad as it seemed to me I was just so sick of having to sit at a desk and waste away, you know what I mean. I want to be doing something, I want to be working in an eviornment where there is room for growth and I wont be stuck being a receptionist for the rest of my life, but here, no this is all I will ever amount to be so of course I became depressed and wanted out. Seriously I never knew people could be so mean and insensitive I went home and cried almost every night I had to close at fucking Chuys. This is where alot of my stress came from but alot of it also came from my sister. Her negativity and complaining and insults really started to get to me. Dealing with the bullshit from Chuy's, being depressed about going no where with my day job and then having to listen to my sister compare her problems to mine, hate on Muffin and just bitch bitch bitch and make me sound like a shitty daughter, grandaughter and sister and then drop out of the wedding and not talk to me. Yes we got into a big fight Wednesday and she dropped out as my Maid of Honor, she told me how much she hated Muffin, that I was "too pretty" to be with him, that I could do better, that he is a selfish asshole and  that since Im choosing him over her she wants nothing to do with my life and her children dont either. All this aweful negative shit started to get to me and then the back pains started. At first it started in my neck and head, I kept having constant headaches every day and this pain in my shoulders. The pain started to shoot down from my neck all the way down my spine to my hips and it just started to spread. Seriously I felt like I was getting sick. It was almost my last week at Chuys. Monday came and I felt like I was coming down with the flu. I mean everyone at my office had it and I had body aches and it felt like I was going to get a fever it was definately the flu. So Muffin rubbed icy/hot all over my body and bought me flu meds and it felt like I was getting better but why the fuck was my body still hurting. On the day before my last day at Chuys I felt so fucking bad. I could barely move my body hurt so much. I called in, they got my last 2 shifts covered and it was Sayonara Chuys. I didnt feel good though, I slept alot but I was always tired my body hurt so bad I would just cry and cry and cry and make Muffin feel bad for not beign able to do something about it. Friday was the worse the pain was so bad my hands, legs and feet started to go numb while Muffin and I were at Michael's(I wanted to make a Halloween wreath for our new place) and walmart buying crafting goods. I felt bad but I had promised that we would craft and carve a pumpkin and all this other fun stuff we kinda had to do it so I went home sat in bed and started my wreath, I finished it and we decorated the patio with Halloween lights, we carved a pumpkin and we watched Trick or Treat it was one of the best days ever. It was freaking late too and I started feeling shitty. I took 6 Advils and passed out. Saturday we ran errands and turned in my keys to my old apartment and never looked back. We went shopping for food for our party because we were going to throw a Dexter premier party and we needed junk food but the pains started and they were bad bad bad I felt like I couldnt walk anymore like the strength from my legs was diminishing, I needed to go home. When we got back home I just started crying but not just crying balling, screaming on my knees hunched over with my face on my thighs just rocking back and forth, it was bad. Muffin called my mom she said to go to the ER and thats what we did. They diagnosed me with viral pharyngitis gave me a steriod shot, pain shot and pain meds and sent me home. This is where Iam at right now. I feel good not super good but better than a couple of hours ago and its 3am. I think its time for bed we shall see what tomorrow brings us.
Thanks for listening guys.

The Skinny Files

Hey Guys so I hope you all are having a great Wednesday, I stayed home from work today to go to the doctor so Ive just been chillaxing. I have been resting all day. I have been having a lot of back and neck pains and today was one of the worse days in pain and it just keeps getting worse. I had Muffin come home from work to take me to the doctor because it was very difficult for me to turn my head from left to right and I was scared to drive. My boss wanted me to call an ambulance because I couldn't even talk to her I was crying in pain so much, she was scared and she knew I was alone. Have you ever been on an ambulance? I haven't, I was way too scared to call one and I didn't want to be in an ambulance all by myself I wanted Muffin there with me.  So we went to the doctor and I was diagnosed with Fibromyalgia. I really don't know how I feel about this I mean I guess it should be expected because I am the girl who gets weird diseases and weird awful shit happens to me all the time so this is my lot in life. I feel fucking shitty!!! All I wanted today after I got home from the doctors office was for Muffin to lay in bed and hold me because I felt like shit and that didn't happen. I was fucking depressed and I felt like my world was crumbling and falling apart and I needed someone to hold me and tell me everything was going to be ok. But I guess I dont fucking deserve that because that never fucking happens in my life. All he did was get himself something to eat, watch Sons of Anarchy and then play video games all fucking day. Even as Im typing this we are in separate rooms and not really talking, what a great fucking life right?! I feel like crap why arent men ever there for you when you really need them. I hate having to ask him to do things like that for me he should already know that when I feel sick I want him to baby me, but I guess I cant ever expect that from him because he cant express those feelings. Maybe one day, I mean a girl can always dream right?!
Anyways I guess I should start writing about weigh/weight loss now...
Before the pains started I was doing really good. Since my last post in August I have lost at least over 30lbs. I was so proud of myself I hadn't noticed how much weight I had lost until my friend Tasha mentioned it to me. I went from weighing 225 5lbs less than Mark to 194 that's 31 lbs since August. All I had been doing was changing the way I ate and not drinking any soft drinks nothing but water. I hadn't even incorporated working out yet. I was about to start working out when the back pains started. I was so excited and pumped, I wanted to start running and training for a marathon. That was my goal to run a marathon by next year. Nothing major just a starter marathon then start building up more and more endurance and then eventually run a half marathon. Since the back pains have started my diet has gone out the window and I just have no motivation to do anything. I just really have no energy anymore and all I want to do is be in a really hot bath or sleeping how can I expect to lose weight. Well today is the last god damn day Im going to let my skinny dream go out the window. Im going to keep going. I was starting to have more confidence in myself once the fat was melting off, I want to feel that again. I haven't gained much just 2lbs but still those are 2 lbs that don't need to be on my body. By December I want to weigh between 160-170 that's 31 more lbs to lose I don't think that it should be that hard but the motivation is the hardest part in this part of my life. That's where this blog comes in. I don't like to portray my life as a lie and I tell the truth here I know not many people that I know don't really read this blog especially now since they think I have given up on blogging anyways so it makes things way easier. Most of the time I exclude people of certain information about my life because Im scared of being judged but I feel like when I blog about it I get it out of my system and Im not really being judged. I mean whoever reads my blog reads it because they want to know about my life if they didn't then they don't have to read it so I know that when Im writing something someone out there reading it really gives a shit about what I have to say. So when Im at a weak point in this weight loss journey I will be turning to this blog for support and motivation. Im getting back on that damn bumpy ass wagon and holding on for dear life because I have less than 2 months to drop another 31lbs. Even if I dont drop the full 31 lbs I just want to drop a significant amount to where I can buy a cute dress for our christmas party.



All right guys I guess thats all for today. Till tomorrow :)

Bienvenidos

Hello fellow bloggers and followers I am happy to say that I broke free of my rut and I am back!!! I really was considering deleting my little blog and never posting about my life again but then I had a revelation. It actually came to me in the form of a dream, I believe alot in dreams and I felt that I needed to start blogging again, so here I am.

Life has actually taken a huge turn for me compared to how it was in my last post. I am happily living with Muffin in our very own amazing apartment with waffle of course. I love it, I think the best part is being able to role over and feel Muffin next to me sleeping soundly and having him with me all the time. Now I dont have to share him with anyone its just us and I love it. I have decided not to leave LMC, the company really isnt for me but it is a great company to work for and the people I work with are pretty fun people. My job can be pretty boring at times but I cant complain it gives me time to blog, read books, google things, get inspiration for our wedding and study when school starts, so I decided that I should stay put for now at least until I finish school then I can leave and pursue other endeavors.  School actually starts pretty soon October 12th to be exact and Im all set up and ready to rock. Recently Ive undergone some changes and they have been good for the most part and I wanted to incorporate them into my blog so I decided that since Im back to blogging, my little blog needs some sprucing up. I decided that I want to incorporate some themes into my little place on the net so this is what I came up with...

• Cure for the Monday Blues - Well this has been a part of my blog for awhile and I love it, it really gets my mornings going so I thin it stays. This is where I post pictures and list all the things that are inspiring me that dreaded Monday morning.
• Bite the Bullet-  I am a very organized person by nature and I love love love making lists so on these days I will be making a bullet list of things I want to do, things I did, things I like,  just cool orderly bullet lists
• The Skinny Files - I have been doing so good with my weight loss lately, better than I have before and I want to be able to talk about my accomplishments, my goals, my struggles and maybe by talking about the long hard road to the perfect bod it will make it easier for me to stick to this life goal. At times I may need some encouragement, and that's when you lovely readers can help me out.
• Hello Muffin Lover - I know Muffin reads my little internet life so this is where he is welcome to come on in and tell us whats up in his world and just get his little spot on the blog
• Weddingland Dreams- This is where I talk about the wedding, post wedding inspirations, accomplishments, struggles and funness
• The Wonderful life of Cupcake and Muffin- This is just like a diary section, daily life pretty much anthing I would want to talk about.
• Through the looking Glass- which will be my life in pictures. Sometimes I just like to post pictures of things that we did, ate, Muffin, Waffle just my life in general and I will, and it will be called "Through the looking Glass

Iam sooo excited. I cant wait to start blogging soon. I will see you guys later got to go bond with waffle while Im home.

The great cupcake charlie brown

So yesterday was not a day of relaxation. I took the day off yesterday to take care of things that were pending and I got everything done. I feel very very accomplished, even though now I'm going to be 8 hrs short on a check, that's the only suck ass part. After all was said and done I was driving home when I saw the "what's Up Cupcake trailer parked outside of one of the clubs on Washington. Muffin and I have seen it before and the idea of selling a cupcake out of  a 1954 Boles Aero Trailer is quite intriguing so I definitely had to pull over and get into some of that cupcake action. The cupcakes were 3 bucks each and they had some flavors I have heard of but never tried so... I figured I could get two, to test them out and see whats up. I got the Nutella one and Strawberry Limeade. I took my babies home, had a mini photo sesh with them and then ate one. The first one to go was the Nutella one. It was very sweet and just OK. It fell short of flavor and it wasn't even moist. Totally threw half of it away. I love love love cupcakes, they are a very integral part of me so I have to try every new flavor, and from every bakery possible. Cupcakes are meant to be a personal dessert, they take time and patience to decorate one small little cake for one person. they are my favorite dessert and I love a good presentation. These cupcakes had a good presence but they lacked flavor. I love Strawberry cupcakes, its my favorite cake but this was dis-gus-ting!.  Needless to say no one beats Crave cupcakes, they are hands down kick your ass good and everyone else just falls short. The only thing that I liked about What's up Cupcake was the name and the trailer, the trailer just tugs and tugs at my gypsy heartstrings. If you could travel and eat in the trailer that would be awesome too, like a travelling dessert diner... AWESOMENESS.

Happy One Year

This weekend was one of the best weekends I have had in a really long time.
Saturday Muffin and I celebrated our 1 year anniversary and it was amazing. I really cant believe 1 year has already gone by. I love him so much, I thank God for bringing him into my life at a time when everything just seemed so hopeless and I needed someone that I could really count on.
So I was scheduled to work at Chuy's at night but I talked to one of the managers and she apparently took care of everything for me. THANK GOD!
So Saturday after our green chili fest meeting Muffin and I had to travel an hr away to go take a look at a reception place that I really needed to see in person. Online it looked like just what I have been hunting for. A cute chapel a really nice reception place and a beautiful landscape all in one. The place sold itself to Mark, who is the final decision maker and I am just tickled pink that we finally have our dream place. The only thing we really have to worry about now is catering, everything else I have under control. hopefully after I talk to my brides maids I have them all on board, I am just so happy that now we can really start planning our "Lovefest". I have a feeling that our wedding will be everything that I was hoping for and more and I cant wait to start crafting and making the cute center pieces and really get my decorations for the reception done. There are so many ideas that I have for the whole thing I cant wait.
OK OK just so you guys know I will be talking a bit more about our wedding and how the planning is going a lot more now that we have the place down, it all just seems so real now.
OK anyways so after all that I felt like we needed a nap so we came home and we slept for like an hour and a half and I had to get ready for our dinner and a movie. He made reservations for us at Maggianos and it was beautiful, and tasty and so romantic. we of course did take a few pics...

 

After dinner we went to go see Rise of the Planet of the Apes which was so good. I don't care what people say, that movie was amazing. I really liked it there were certain parts in which I did sneak a tear or two without letting Muffin know, it was good. Then it was time to come home and snuggle and just love on each other for the few hours we had left. It was such a good night I cried and freaked Muffin out. I just felt so loved by him and I knew that it was going to end soon and I was going to have to wait a whole week to see him again. I hate that, I definitely cant wait till we have our very own apartment where he really wont have to listen to anyone and just be with me all the time because its OUR apartment. Its going to be so lovely, come on October I'm so ready for you.

Bad day please go away

So yesterday I was in a pretty good mood, I was listening to my good mood play list for most of the day and then decided to switch it up and listen to Korn. I had forgotten how much I actually loved that band. Their first CD will always be my favorite, when I would feel like such an outcast in high school, they were my best friends and that CD helped my cope with how mean high school girls can be. Seriously I think your teen years are what shape you. I was such a nerdy little depressed, angry girl when I was in high school. I never thought I was pretty, I didn't think I was worth while, I didn't attempt to date I was just weird. I focused more on other things. I was the funny girl, I was super sarcastic and weird, I knew more about art and music than anything else. That awkwardness is what makes me , me now. I'm not shy anymore, I'm not socially awkward, I can talk to anyone and make friends easily, I have a wide range of taste in music, I know a lot about makeup and fashion and I am beautiful. I love myself now more than I ever did and I know I am worth more than anything. I cant believe how far I have come, and that CD made me remember how hard my teen years were and what helped me cope. Now when I'm having problems with girls anywhere I feel like Korn will be there for me.

On other news I freaking had an accident yesterday after work. I was pulling out from the street I work on into a busy street. I didn't see anyone coming except an 18 wheeler that was turning onto the street I was coming from. So I go for it apparently that truck blocked more of the street view than I thought because I almost hit a Ford Ranger. Luckily I slammed on my breaks and so did he. It all happened so slowly and if he would have swerved over he probably wouldn't of hit me. He just scraped the front of my car with the front of his truck and tore off my license plate. But the mother fucker wanted to file a report since it was in a company car, now I just have to wait and see what the fuck is going to happen. Its sad because I was trying so hard to not swell on the bad that everything was going to be OK and then this shit happened. I'm really hoping that today is a much better day. I will be going to work at Chuy's tonight, Hopefully its a good night and I get to work with the people I like to talk to. Maybe I might stay after work and have a drink. I know they all like to go get drinks outside of Chuy's on Fridays. I might join them today, but maybe not. I might be too tired and I will be having Muffin come over in  the morning and I will be having to get up super early for our green chili festival meeting at Chuys. All I'm asking for is a good day!

A Sunday kind of Love

Ive been listening to this playlist all morning an it just makes me so happy, I cant describe why. A coworker of mine says that it makes him kind of sad, but I guess thats what makes me me and this playlist makes my heart want to dance around naked!!!



Im so happy that things between Muffin and I are great, I love him so much. I just cant wait to marry him. who wouldve thought that me Christian Renee would ever be married. My idea of a perfect life back in college was...

Me  a makeup artist/ photographer living in a loft in NYC working for Vogue with other great makeup artists. Working during the day, making good money and living like a fashionista should at night. Going to parties and just having fun. That was me I didnt want a husband, a dog, a cat, or a baby, not even a house. I wanted to go from guy to guy never commiting and just having fun.

Look at me now 3 years later. Working at a landscaping company, living in an apartment in the greater heights, with a chubby little cat and I am now engaged. I can believe how much my life has changed since I have met Muffin. I hardly drink these days, I dont smoke anything but cigarretes and now I see myself planning a future home for not just me for "US". I wouldnt change it for the world. He encourages me to go after what I want, if it wasnt for his encouragement and his offers to help me pay for school I probably wouldnt besigned up to go to Aveda this October. I love my life as of right now. I love having him in my small universe. I cant wait to get married, share our happiness with our close family and friends,  go on our honeymoon, buy our first furniture set, buy our first bedroom set, buy our first home, have our first dinner party, go on many vacations with him and have our first child. These are the best years of my life and Iam so happy Iam sharing them with a person that loves me so much. Trust me come October Im not letting anything come between me and Muffin. I will fight anyone who comes near lol.


Lol I love you guys, Thank you to everyone that reads this I love you small group of people and I really appreciate you taking time out of your busy day to see whats going on in my life.

Wake up its FRIDAY!!!

So today I woke up a bit inspired. I feel like I need to quit wallowing in self pity and do what I have to do to make myself a better person. I got to see Muffin yesterday for what felt like only an hour and I miss him so much.Now that he has actually been working a lot and eating out less I totally noticed that he is losing weight, which in turn makes me feel really gross about myself. So I have decided that instead of wasting time lounging around the house missing him I'm going to be productive. I'm going to start preparing multiple meals at night for the week when I'm not working at Chuy's and I have the whole night to myself. I'm definitely going to work out in any spare time I might have and I'm just going to focus on taking care of myself.

Goals for the next two months

• I wont be going out driving because I'm bored and spending money on gas

• I'm going to limit my smoking alot more and hopefully one day before I'm 50 I will have rid myself from all forms of smoking.

• I will be taking vitamins daily on top of taking probiotics, digestive enzymes and my daily dose of     B-12

•  I will only be drinking water unless I'm at a restaurant where I have the choice of teas never sodas, I will also be limiting my caffeine intake.

• I will be exercising in every free moment I have, I will try to go walk/jog around memorial park every night unless I'm working at Chuy's because walking at night alone could be quite dangerous

• I will be eating out way less unless its on a date with a girlfriend, muffin or my family

• I will be limiting my drinking alot more because its not that good for me to begin with and its expensive

• I will not be lounging around the house feeling sorry for myself because there are too many things that I could be doing other than that

• I will get back into hoola hooping

• I will try to go to the YMCA at least 3 times a week depending on my work schedule

• I will try to at least (minimum) to put 50 dollars into savings every week

• I will try not to eat junk food but once a week, and not over due it when I do

• I will stop sabotaging myself and not do harmful things to my body, I will not be self destructive again.

I decided to come up with a plan to better myself and my body. I feel like I have such a toxic body that its starting to affect my happiness and way of life, so if I start to eat better and take care of myself everything else will just fall into place. I feel like at 24 its time to grow up, use my brain and mature my life style. My health isn't the only thing that will improve by October you will see a happier more stable Christian Renee. I don't want to be depressed, angry or stressed out all the time anymore. I definitely don't want it to affect my relationship with Muffin, so I'm making this change before I spiral down again. I deserve to be happy, and its not just going to come knocking on my apartment door one day. I have to make that change and I start now.

Wish me luck guy because I know its going to be a long hard bumpy ride!!! I hope you have a great weekend, I know I will.

Its Cupcake and Muffin's 1 year anni tomorrow hopefully we get to see each other, I'm really really wanting to go see Rise of the Planet of the Apes... hopefully I do.

Cure for the Monday Blues

So its Monday!!! I had an interesting weekend. I had my orientation on Saturday at 9am but it only lasted an hr. The guy giving me my orientation really wanted me to start on Monday so today will be my official orientation, Im so nervous. I did get to spend some time with muffin, but not nearly as much as I would have liked. I really hate his new work schedule because during the week I never see him and on the weekends I see him until 6pm when he leaves for work. I just hate it.

Saturday after Mark left for work I was smoking outside alking to Anthony about conspiracy theories and super natural things that we have heard of and then we decided that we wanted to go ghost hunting one day. So later on after Rochelle cam over we all decided that we would go ghost hunting, it was spooky but alot of fun and I wish that Muffin was there to protect me when I was super scared. We got home a little after 3am and I wanted to stay up to wait for Muffin but that was a total fail. Sunday Katherine came over and we hung out for a bit went out to dinner and then I looked at wedding stuff after she had left. It was uneventful, I just wanted Muffin there.

So today things that are making my Monday morning

                    1. Amy Winehouse

Her death was a sad one but she did leave us with some amazing and soulful music, so I will dwell on the good and not on all the negativity that everyone else is dwelling on. She was beautiful and her music will not be forgotten. I have been listening to her all morning and I feel good

  

2. The 27 Club

I know this is morbid or weird but I like to think that even though these amazing artists died at such a young age they are out there jamming together and having a ball. Now Amy Winehouse is there to join a big rocking party

3. Peter Pan

This is a quote that I love from Peter Pan and sometimes I want to be Wendy

4. I never want my children to worry about their weight or develop any type of eating disorder and that is why I have been trying so hard to practice good healthy eating habbits

5. Cute Kid costumes

This was such a mind fuck of a movie and too see a little kid dressed up as a droog I think is quite adorable

6. Anything Rockabilly

This piece of Elvis just screams rockabilly to me and I love zombies

8. Rockabilly lifestyle

I love seeing cute rckabilly couples dressing the part and driving cool cars, one day this will be me.

9. This cute picture of kissing finger figures, I love them so much they definately make me happy

10. Of course its Muffin!!!

Ugh ive been missing him like crazy. Even though we argue and bitch at eachother I cant imagine him not by my side. I love him and I will always love him, forever and ever.

Love and Cupcakes

Well I guess life kind of carried me away this week. I have had a pretty busy week and I am just exhausted. My sister had her baby on Monday and Iam a proud aunt of a beautiful baby girl, Rozlyn Renee. Now I have two babies to love, up until I have one of my own. Im soooo excited. Ok so yesterday I had my second interview at Chuy's and I for sure have the job Iam so stoked. I cant wait to start, although I am a little nervous. Its just your normal "first day of school" jitters. But I guess I can look at it this way, Im not there to make friends Iam there to make money. Although having new friends is always great, I love meeting and hanging out with new people. I miss my starbucks friends so much some times. I dont really keep up with their lives anymore though. I used to talk to them everyday but now I think I mostly just talk to Brittney out of all of them. Iam so tired and bored with my life right now, it hasnt brought me to tears yet so thats good. I just want to get out of my desk job and go out there and do something. 8-5 jobs are so boring I really dont see how people stay in these jobs for too long, Im itching to leave. I just need to find a job that will pay me more which wont happen until after school. Sometimes it isnt too bad but seriously I feel like there is more highschool drama in corporate jobs than there are in other jobs. I feel like I have to watch my back all the times because there is always someone out to get you and everyone is pretty much just looking out for themselves. Its really sad I thought that by taking this job I would be going into a more adult enviorment where there is less drama, the only thing thats changed is my ability to joke and goof off the way I used to at Starbucks. Dont get me wrong, I love my job it just that there are those times when I really dont feel like dealing with drama.

What I most want you to dream of, Christian, are possibilities that thrill you.

What I most want you to feel, is happy.

And what I most want you to know, is that you're loved.

Always,
    The Universe

This was my note from the Universe this morning and it made me really happy. I love my little notes I get every morning, but this one made feel warm and fuzzy inside and extra special, thank you Universe.

I finally got to see Muffin this morning after spending 2 whole days without him, I got to see him for like 5 mins, but it was good to see him.

I miss him so much. I dont know if I told you that they changed his work schedule and from now until the end of the job he will be working night shifts, which means we will never see eachother. As I wake up adn get ready for work he is leaving work so we slip by without seeing eachother and as Im getting off work he is going into work. Today is day 3 where he is working this schedule and I definately dont like it. I thought we would at least have more time to cuddle tomorrow but tomorrow is my first day working at Chuy's and they are doing orientation at 9am :( Im hoping that they tell me to come in later or maybe on Sunday. My manager Elliot is supposed to call me today and confirm my 9am orientation, he hasnt done it yet so who knows.

All day today Ive been reading wedding blogs and getting ideas and cute wedding inspiration to include in my reception, all I know is that I want it to be cute, small and filled with lots and lots of love.

That is it for all guys, Im hoping that life gives me at least an hour break for blogging purposes a day, so I can just realease some of my thoughts that are jumbled in this overworked brain of mine

Lots of love

Suki

Sunday funday

Good afternoon guys.
So i woke up pretty early this morning, I had a job interview at Chuy's and I ...... Got the job.
Hurray!!! I have been so stressed about money this whole month I haven't been able to think about anything else in awhile. Now I wont be stressing, the manger who interviewed me this morning was so sweet I cant wait to start working there. The Muffin and I went to IHOP to celebrate for breakfast and it was yummy I was in the mood for pancakes. Then I was also in the mood to hold some puppies. We went to the pet shop by where we were it was called Pet City, and I fell in love with the most adorable puppy in the world. It was so cute, it was an adorable English bully and he seemed to really like Mark. Anytime Mark walked away he would start looking for him, he would even lick the glass and try to get at Mark. We finally asked the lady if we could hold him and we were in love, up until she told us that she wanted 3,000 for it. How the hell can you put a price like that on a dog. I was so sad most of those poor puppies looked like they really needed some love and they just looked so miserable behind the glass waiting for someone to love them, I wanted to rescue them all. For the rest of the day I will be chilling and getting ready for the week. I think I have to go grocery shopping and wash some clothes other than that I will be chilling by the pool and destressing. Too bad all of my friends have to work this weekend or I would sat pool party.

But before I leave, I leave you with some angry comics

The big 2-5

                   

            Happy Thursday!!!!

So Ive been thinking alot about me turning 25 this year and it scares me. I cant believe Im going to be 25!!!
There are so many things I want to do.  So I have come up with a list of things I would like to accomplish before the big day. I guess its ok if I dont get to do all of them but I would really like to so here it goes, here is my list...

• Learn how to ride a bike
• Go hiking and have a really nice picnic with Mark
• Learn how to sew on a sewing machine
• Learn how to cook a delicious meal without any mistakes
• Start rollerblading and get good, so I can one day join a derby team
• Go to a drag show
• Go berry picking, it sounds so much fun and so delicious
• Have a really sexy photoshoot for myself that I can be proud of
• Start a scrapbook
• Go to A new Heart for XMAS
• Go to Chicago and visit Chris Romo
• Launch our online store (my mom and I) for baby stuff
• Launch my own store
• Learn more about cupcake decorating and buy more decorations and supplies
• Get more crafty and make more things for my online store
• Get more tattoos
• Stretch out my ears but keep them from blowing out
• Finally be completely detoxified and have an alkaline body

So far these are the things I want to accomplish before Im 25 which is in 5 mos hopefully I can do all of them but if not they can roll over and be goals before Im 26 lol


Here is some cupcake inspiration!!!

Here comes the sun

Its Tuesday, man I am really tired today. I guess Im still feeling the effects of having a heat stroke. Seriously, who the hell would of thought that I would fall vicitm to the sun's vicious rays. But alas, it was fun seeing Mark freaked out and panic stricken that something would happen to me, hes my night in shining armour. Well I guess you must know the whole story, since I really dont have anything interesting to say other than Im having serious tummy issues and Im going home at noon.
OK so Saturday June 25, 2011 was the Vans Warped Tour here in Houston at the Sam Houston Racetrack. Gates we supposedly going to open at 10am so we needed to get there early so we could be first in line. We get there at about 9 something and the line was already long, there were tond of people there and then we found out that the gates werent opening till 11. So we waited in the smoldering heat. I slathered on sun screen while we were in the car on both of us, but it really didnt make a difference we sweated it all off by the time they let us in. Waiting in line was actually really scary, because everyone was so hot, there werent any restrooms or water the crowd started a riot. They started by throwing cds in the air, then it led to throwing bible type books, then trash, and then rocks. They started screaming I was so scared to get him luckily I didnt. So we got to see one band Asking Alexandria and we (Muffin and I) made friends with these two guys standing next to us. They were from Lafayette, Louisiana and there names were Chris and Col. Smith. They were funny and they introduced me to hardcore dancing.








Apparently thats what all the cool kids do at these shows. I had a fun time watching them actually doing it, it was so ridiculous and funny. I wonder if these kids actually know what they look like.
Anyways so we talked with these guys and then Asking Alexandria came out and they were amazing all cute and what not with their friendly british accents. LOVE!!!
During the show I was like playing a game of jump or get stomped on and elbow anyone near in the face with all the natives around me, for awhile it was fun, up until I was suffocating because everyone around me was like a mountain in the smoldering heat dripping in sweat. I couldnt breath so I clawed my was out of that heat pit and Muffin and I went to buy water. It was such a hot day we bought so much water and we were just walking around or standing around or trying to find a place to sit down it was useless. So as we were waiting to see one of the bands I really wanted to see (Hellogoodbye) I started to feel very nauseous, then I could barely stand. I started to feel really dizzy and Mark went to buy me another water. When we got to the stand there wasnt any left anywhere in the park. The whole park was dry, they had to call for reinforcements. So as I was walking to find a place to sit I could go no longer, so Mark dragged me to the medical tent. After that it was all down hill from there. I had heat stress and when he realesed me he said that if I got worse I had to go home because it was serious and it did get worse. We left I was feeling awful, sunburned, thirsty, no energy to even climb into the truck it was awful. I got home and slept the day away and Iam never doing that again. all I have to say is F U sun, how could you be so mean to me!!!

Gloomy weather = love

So yesterday it rained her in Houston!!! YAAAAAAY
We hadnt had real rain (not like misting rain)in Houston since Februaury. We were going through a drought, we even had 22 wildfired in Texas! That never happens. So of course we here at the office had to go outside and play in it!!!

Today it was raining this morning as well, so Im in a very lazy mood. I just want to crawl into bed with Muffin and sleep all day. I wish it would start to rain hard, so hard that we have a power outage and we get to go home. Today Muffin had to drive me to work since it was raining. I have really bad breaks and I almost killed myself driving in the rain yesterday trying to get to work. Yesterday was so much fun, it really felt like a friday. I got to take a 2 hr lunch and go to Niko Nikos with Katherine, one of our interns. It was so much fun, we even planned a girls date because we had so much fun. Movies, sushi, drinks and a pedi. Sounds amazing doesnt it!!!! I love her she is amazing, I definately dont want her to go back home once her internship is over. Hopefully they will offer her a job here once she graduates. Well thats all as of right now. Hopefully later on I will have something more interesting to talk about

Cure for the Monday blues

Well today is Monday and Iam dragging and trudging on through the day. I had one hell of a weekend. I had my nephew for the whole weekend. I went to go pick him up Friday after work and he stayed until like 10am, when I drove him home. It was very sad taking him back to my sister because I enjoyed him so much. I didnt think I could handle having a kid and I was so nervous that he was going to cry Friday night because he wanted to go back home but he didnt and it was awesome. So things that are inspiring me and keeping me going this dreary Monday morning in Houston, TX are ...

1. Pools and swimming in 101degree weather.

This weekend I spent 2 days in the pool with wolfie and it was heaven in the awful texas summer heat

2. Cuddles

I got to cuddle with my wolfie all weekend and I also got plenty of cuddles from Muffin on Sunday, it was heaven

3. Being a mommy for three days.

Pretending to be a mommy was like training for 3 days and Iam so ready to be a mommy. I can feel it, I want one, I think Im ready!!!

4. Redbox movies

Theres nothing better than going to get movies that you werent able to see in theaters for a dollar. There are so many redboxes out there and good choices in films as well

5. Sundays

I never thought I would say this but I love Sundays its our lazy days. Muffin and I wash clothes and lounge around the house watching movies (oldies but goodies and new releases), we might swim, but mostly its just cuddling and being around eachother

6.  Water aerobics

Man I always thought that is was for older people, but its so much fun and Iam actually so sore the next day. I will be doing this every Monday through Thurday until October. Maybe I will be a tad more fit before I start school

7. Zumba

I was very skeptical about this form of exercise when I first heard of it but trying it out for the first time blew my mind. I will definately be adding it to my life this year and maybe even take it a step further and master belly dancing

8. Wolfie

Inever knew how much I could love a person until he came into my life. All I want to do is be there for him, protect him and never disappoint him. He is the best thing in this world God could have sent me.

9. Pedicures, Bubble Tea and Sushi

Omg I have been craving this combo for the longest time. I think I might need a date with my cousin pretty soon. Hes the only guy I know that will enjoy this as much as I do. Or maybe this is an outing with the girls!!!

10. Muffin

I love Mark so much and I thank God everyday for bringing me such a wonderful man into my life. I want everything be be wonderful and amazing for us and I definately cant wait until October 27, 2012 to become Christian Renee Belle

11. Best friends

I have a select few that I just have to talk to or text on the daily and they inspire me and keep me dreaming and never let me off my cloud. Its because of their friendship that Im the goof ball I am today and I want them to be a part of my life forever. Thanks chiclets I love you!!!

Cure for the Monday Blues

Hey guys sorry Im posting this so late, I had such a busy busy day at work. I had a crazy weekend and I guess I don't really feel like reminiscing on it. Other than the fact that I got to see She Wants Revenge with two of my favorite people, Mark and Brittany. So things that Im loving this week are somewhat close to my heart at the moment and are what is keeping me going, so here it goes.

1. She Wants Revenge, they win hands down kick ass for sure

2. My lovely fiance Mark Belle and all the silly things he does to make me happy.

3. My favorite chiclet of all time Ms. Brittany Cross

4. My cat waffle, even though he can be a little jackhole at times. I totally love him.

5. My wonderful little boy wolfie, he is the light in my life.

6. Pugs pigs pugs!!! I totally want one so I can name him either pancake, bacon, or donut. Too cute!

Im loving my life so much right now, I cant really ask for more. I hope you all had an amazing weekend I know I did. Love you all have a great night

A day for Charity

Iam so stoked for today. Number one its Friday and number to its like pretty much going to be a half day.
Today the company that I work for is going to do the Beautification project. We as a company have chosen a person in need and we will beautify their landscaping and make their gardening dreams come true. The case we have chosen is of a 23 year old soldier who was shot in the neck and paralyzed from the waist down. This is his story...

A wounded GI's new battle
Sugar Land soldier is one of thousands returning home disabled
By ROSANNA RUIZ
Houston Chronicle


It was about 1 p.m., and his convoy had paused at a checkpoint near Baqubah, Iraq, northeast of Baghdad, after a report that a man may have planted a bomb. Just the week before, in the same area, an improvised explosive device detonated under his vehicle, damaging the windows.
The team was on alert, but Cannon noticed nothing suspicious.
"I don't remember hearing the first shot," he says, "but I remember feeling short of breath." Five weeks ago, a sniper dropped this Sugar Land soldier, barely out of his teens. The bullet struck him in the neck, exited his back and left him paralyzed below the waist. As Cannon left the battlefield, he joined a growing procession of service members coming home from the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan not in flag-draped coffins, but casualties nonetheless. "An Iraqi national, a local, told us that somebody suspicious had dropped something off that looked like an IED," he says. "It might've been a setup, it might've been there, but we didn't know." His team leader told him to get down, but Cannon couldn't move. His hands and feet were like lead. Another bullet ricocheted off the turret.
He learned he'd been shot only after his team leader radioed the others. The convoy was forced to push forward to reach a nearby aid station. "I didn't know what was going to happen and I was like, 'Am I gonna die?'" Cannon says. "He told me to keep my eyes open and to look at him, and I remember seeing a tear drip down his face." At the aid station, Cannon made a doctor promise not to let him die. From Iraq, he was flown to Landstuhl, Germany, where doctors used bone from his hip to salvage a ravaged portion of his vertebrae. They reinforced his back with metal rods and pins during a 10-hour surgery. "I'm going to walk again as much as it's going to take out of me," he said. "No matter what I do, I want to walk again." For now, Cannon can be counted on to lighten the mood with jokes about the bicycle ride he will take or the spinners he wants for his wheelchair. His sense of humor and "smart ass" sensibilities help him stay positive as he remains "fixated on living hour by hour." He quickly became expert at maneuvering his motorized wheelchair, equipped with two controls similar to joy sticks. All of his equipment and medical costs are covered by the VA and will be for the rest of his life. He also can count on monthly VA benefits of $2,300.
 

Our Company has a mission ans its "To make a more beautiful place to live work and play"
When my boss heard his story he knew we had to do something to help him and so this is our Beautification Project. Every year we like to give something back to the world so we pick a case that speaks to all of us. We want everyone to see the oue world is still a very beautiful place and there are plenty of people willing to help and share and love one another the way that we should. We want to make his life a more beautiful place to live and work and play, so the beautification project is on. It just so Happens that today is his birhtday so we are also throwing him a little surprise party. We leave here at 10:30am and wont be back until 3pm. Im excited. His dream was to have a back yard that could be like a manly get away where he can barbeque and just hang out with his friends and drink. So we bout him a beautiful rustic out door cooler that has cool Texas symbolys burned into the wood. Its truely beautiful, it made me want one for my someday house and I just found out that one of my coworkers is know for making them so I asked him to make me one as a wedding gift! That would be sooo cool.  Anyways back to Dillon, So his backyard is going to have neautiful ladscaped garden and flowers and a picnic area, barbecue pit and the cooler. We are going to make it his grilling paradise, well thats our dream.

Under the blacklight

Jenny Lewis - Carpetbaggers.mp3

Wow yesterday was a blasty blast I couldn't believe it. I had such a good time and I think that was just what I needed to get my mind off of a few things.  I had asked Marisa to come over to the house and come hang out with me and go swimming so I was so ready to get off work yesterday!

So i get home fairly early because I told her we were meeting at 6pm. I waited for Mark to get home so we could go to Walmart and buy stuff to drink. I mean when Marisa is coming over and you put us two girls together there has to be alcohol

I relapsed yesterday, I'm really disappointed in myself but I felt like I needed to destress. I asked Mark to buy us a pack of cigarettes and he smoked the whole pack between me and him. I feel very guilty about it, only because I was doing so good. The stress with my sister just got to me and all day yesterday I was crying on and off. Its only when I get very emotionally stressed that I need a cigarette. Its OK though because today is a new day and i wont be smoking for awhile. My first cigarette of the night came with an amazing high , I felt like I was floating and I just couldn't understand why I quit in the first place. I love smoking, it really calms me down but I'm so worried about getting seriously sick when I'm older, and because of vanity reasons. Also if I ever have children I don't ever want them to be influenced to smoke because of Mark and I so I think those are pretty valid reasons.

So anyways once we returned to Mark's house we got the party started. Anthony was there and his pseudo- girlfriend too, Rochelle. I think that's how you spell her name. I'm not very good with meeting new girls I'm very very skeptical because girls are the toughest people to make friends with, unless of course you are a guy. I don't know its a jealousy thing with all women, so the few girlfriends I have I know them pretty well, trust them and keep them because they are nothing like your average crazy jealous girls. I have seen her a couple of times at the house before and I totally want to get to know her. Iam very quick to judge people and when someone just doesn't set well at first meeting, I usually follow with caution because there is usually a reason for that feeling.

So it was three girls and two guys, we changed up (Marisa and I) and got our drink on early. We jumped in the pool and swam and talked and drank and ate, it was so much fun. Then when it started to get darker the guys jumped in the pool and Rochelle was being very self conscience about her body but we got her to put her feet in the pool. After that much Marisa ended up pulling her into the pool fully dressed. Then we were just goofing off drinking, telling stories and swimming. Then Anthony called their friend Caesar and he came over and we hung out with him. It was a lot of fun, I'm glad we did this because now we got to all know eachother a little better and I was distracted from my family drama. I love meeting mew people and getting to know Mark's friends. I cant wait to be married to him and live with him. We are going to be so happy and life is just going to be a blasty blast!

Something to look forward to

Ok so its Wednesday and Im really glad that it feels like this week is going to go by really fast. I just cant wait till Saturday, Im peeing in my pants with excitement! Not really Im just super stoked. I found out this weekend that one of my favorite bands is going to be coming to Houston and playing at a really cool venue for super cheap. Of course I have to go and I will the best part is that I am making it a girls night out and taking two of my best friends with me. Brittany and Haley. I cant wait. The band is She Wants Revenge. Ive seen them before when they played with Kill Hannah (my number one favorite band). This time I dont know who they are head lining for but Iam stoked. I was going to force Mark to go with me but then when I asked my cousin to go he was completely off the hook and happy. He even planned a DUDE'S NIGHT OUT! How cute is that?! So when my cousin bailed out on me I was not going to tell him because I know he wouldnt let me go alone and I definately didnt want him to cancel DUDE NIGHT. But I told him and he came up with the brilliant idea of asking my best girlfriends from Starbucks. Chances of them going looked very bleak. I didnt think they would ever want to go but it wouldnt hurt to try so I did. Then it all came together and a magical girls night out was planned and I couldnt be happier. THANKS MARK!! So the plan for Saturday is... Wake up brush my teeth and get ready, wait for Brittany to get to Mark's house. Im going to do her makeup because we are going to try to take some awesome pictures while we are meandering around town. We will go thrifting at some places neither of us have been to before, go to the galleria and buy some makeup at Sephora.  We will probably eat at some point during the day, so theres that. I know that we have to look super cute because we will be taking pictures all over Houston, so then theres that. Then there is a gap between that and the concert. Maybe we might go back, she might go home and then we nap till its time to go to the concert and we rendevous at Starbucks. Haley doesnt know where Mark lives so Im thinking this might be easier. I dont really know I guess we will just play it by ear because plans arent ever really secure in my life. I just hope no one backs out, that tends to happen alot. I cant wait we will have a blasty blast.