Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Traditions Never Die

So because I have a Mexican family and I was raised by my grandparents that are from Monterrey Nuevo Leon we really didn’t follow any “American” holidays! My mom had to work a lot when I was a kid and I remember on Thanksgiving when all my friends were excited about eating turkey and celebrating with their family I was always bummed because my sister and I never got to celebrate it. As I grew older it just didn’t seem so important to me anymore. My mom started to not work Holidays but she never wanted to cook so instead she started our very own thanksgiving tradition which was. Waking up super early to go to the thanksgiving parade, go home and she would make us a good breakfast and we would watch movies all day with her until about 6pm when she would take us to the Christmas lighting of Post Oak and they had like their own mini Christmas parade. She would go to a drive thru pizza place and order us a large pizza and a liter of coke with 3 cups and we would have a mini picnic in her car as we drove down to go look at all the houses that had Christmas lights up. Then she would take us to a thanksgiving movie and that was our tradition. I loved it, this was the most fun ever because I got to spend time with my always working mom.

Now that Im older and my mother has been remarried for the past 10 years I skip Thanksgiving all together. Since 2007 I started to work on major holidays so I wouldn’t have to deal with family drama and that was awesome getting away from it all. So this Thanksgiving that I spent with Mark is the first one in almost 4 years. It was a lot of fun being around him but I did make him go with me to a movie because I will never let that tradition die.
I forced him to go see Burlesque with me and I thought the move was ok. The costume and dancing and glamour of it all is what drew me in like a moth to light and that’s when I decided that I wanted to be a Burlesque dancer ha ha ha. Of course that will never fly with Mark but it’s a good dream right? I mean they are so beautiful and their costumes and shoes and makeup and hair is just amazing and their bodies are gorgeous from all of the dancing I want to be a burlesque dancer.

Sunday, November 28, 2010

Holiday.... Celebrate

Well Thanksgiving was pretty awesome. I got up pretty early to finish baking a really low fat vanilla crème and pumpkin cheesecake which is off of hungry Girls website. I was way too tired to finish it up on Wednesday so I woke up early to finish it on Thursday.  Anyway so I cleaned the apartment played with waffle and then started to get ready to go over to Mark’s house to meet his mother. I was so freaking nervous about this you know how it is to meet the parents of someone youre dating, its freaking awful and nerve wrecking. I made caramel pumpkin muffins to take over to her house so I wouldn’t go empty handed plus I was always told that is great if you bring something over (they were AMAZING). My family really never celebrates Thanksgiving so I really don’t know about this.
OMG I just remembered this awful nightmare I had the night before meeting his mom it was about Mark and one of his friends Anabelle, it was probably because I was so stressed out about meeting his mother and Anabelle at the same time.
 Ok so a little background information. I met Mark 4yrs ago in college it was my second year there. Well he wasn’t actually in school with me he was a friend of a friend and I met him at a gathering at my friend’s house. We dated back then but it didn’t even last a month, it was a very sad sad relationship and I broke his heart. I told him that I needed a break from him and then I never contacted him again, I wouldn’t answer phone calls, text messages, MySpace messages (MySpace was super popular back then) nothing. I wanted him to just disappear because I didn’t want to think I had hurt anyone. I was stupid and naïve back then. Well anyways after that all of his friends hated me obviously because of this but Anabelle I felt hated me even more because her sister hated me. We actually got back together because even after 4yrs I felt guilty for what I had done to him and a part of me I guess really did love him because I would think about him all the time. So one day on Facebook I saw a random picture of him and he was tagged in it so I knew he had a facebook and so I wrote him an apology through facebook. I didn’t know how else to contact him so I figured this was a good plan and I totally wasn’t expecting anything from this I just wanted to apologize maybe then I could stop thinking about him. So he accepted my apology and we started hanging out and 4 months later here we are. I love him so much and I really cant think of my life without him, he is my everything.
Ok so back to my story so my nightmare was…

I go over to Mark’s house I already know Anabelle we have talked several times, gone out on double dates, we get along pretty well, we are friends only because our boyfriends are best friends so it was kind of like a familiar setting. So I start talking to her as usual and I can tell something is up because she has some weird look on her face like she wants to tell me something and then I notice Mark is acting weird and I take her outside so I can have a cigarette and we start talking and she starts to talk about Mark and then it kind of hits me. She is totally in love with my boyfriend and something has happened and she wants to tell me so I question her over and over and then she finally tells me that she has slept with Mark. They slept together last night while I was at my apartment baking for this stupid lunch with his mother, she stayed over and they slept together and my mouth freaking dropped and I fell to my knees crying. I didn’t understand because she was dating his best friend Curtis and Mark is with me so I just couldn’t understand how they could ruin 2 relationships. I quickly got over my sadness and it all turned to anger and I told her I knew something was going on all along but she fucked up and if she wasn’t going to tell Curtis I was. I asked her if she was always in love with Mark and she started crying and she said No. She said that Mark had confessed to her that he was always in love with her and Curtis didn’t treat her like she deserved. He told her he was only with me because he was tired of being alone but he really loved her and now she really loved him. I quickly went inside and Mark was playing video games with Curtis and smiled at me and I smiled back and I grabbed my purse and left gracefully my face covered in tears makeup running down my face. Curtis not Mark chased after me and asked me what was wrong and was hugging me and I just turned to him and said ask Anabelle I’m sure she will be glad to tell you and I kissed him on the cheek got into my car and drove away.

Then I woke up crying!!! I know it was a dream and none of it is true but it felt so freaking real and when I woke up, I felt like it really had taken place I was so confused. I didn’t even know what to think because it was the same setting that was going to be on Thanksgiving so I was a little worried and I didn’t want to go after that dream I didn’t want it to come true. Anyways it actually went really well, I got there on time Anabelle was late and so was Curtis. I love Curtis he seems like a sweet person. Whenever I was having problems with Mark working out of town and I was missing him and thinking about giving up on our relationship. Curtis was the one that talked to me and gave me reasons to keep trying, reassured me of Mark’s love for me. I know that Mark reassured me too but I needed advice from someone who knew him better than I did and who loved him and would want the best for him. So I like Curtis and I know that he is a true friend to Mark. Anabelle is actually really cool, nothing like her sister who hated me. She really does remind me of like a girl version of Mark with fashion skills, I like her. I wish we could be friends, hopefully in the future we can be, she seem like such an interesting and talented person. Im glad everything is in the past and I really had nothing to worry about, and my dreams/nightmares are just nightmares!!!
Meeting Mark’s mom and Anabelle actually wasn’t as bad as I thought it was going to be. Marks’s mom was actually down to earth and really nice. She took us both to go eat at Bennihana’s on Friday and then to the Nutcracker. She even bought me a hot pink Tiara and didn’t say a word because I wore it as if I were a five year old. Ha ha ha she accepted my weirdness at least to my face who know what she was thinking on the inside. All in all it was a good holiday break.

Sunday, November 21, 2010

My Hunny Bunny's Birthday

So yesterday was my babycakes birthday and I wanted to be the best girlfriend ever and just surprise him with a dinner, cake and small gift.
What really ended up happening was that I freaking missed him way too much and I called him to come home early, so he was at home watching TV and keeping me company while I played housewife in the Kitchen.

This was the first meal I had actually ever cooked on my own and I got the recipe off of Paula Deans recipes off of the Food Network. The meal turned out ok... I made him loaded mashed potatoes which I added mucho ucho cheese because Iam a cheeseaholic, I made baked macaroni and cheese, and meat loaf.

Everything tasted really good except for the meatloaf, I dont know but I dont think that meat should come shaped like a log and just be gooey like it was. He was so excited and it made me so happy, if he really didnt like his meal he never showed me that he didnt like it. This is why I love him.
Anyways I was so rushed to finish the food that when I was baking I didnt really have time to let the cake cool and when I put the icing on it, it just started melting off and separating. I should have known better I mean I did go to baking school for goodness sake but I didnt care I was tired and hungry and when I get hungry everything starts to go black and I get mean ha ha ha. So the cake was a bit of a disaster but it did taste good and thats all that matters.

After he blew out the candles...
 and then butchered his mess of a cake...

(I cant believe you can see a picture of me as the background on his phone ha ha ha)
Mark is like the hardest person to buy gifts for but I managed to get him somethings that he might like.
I got him a plain silver zippo lighter
A keychain set with a cupcake and a muffin. I got the muffin and he got the cupcake so when he sees his keys he will always think of me. HES MY MUFFIN AND IM HIS CUPCAKE!!!
I also got him a promise ring it was a cheapy ring from Aldo's but it was pretty cool looking and I think he liked it.

After it all he started playing with my feet and pretending to eat my toes while I was trying to relax on the floor in front of the TV. I love my goofey boyfriend he is just too cute

All in all I think I gave him a good birthday. He told me that he hates to celebrate his birthday and me being me who loves to celebrate just about anything had to change his mind. I love my muffin!!!

Saturday, November 20, 2010

Spontaneous dates of Suki and Lola

 So i took the day off on Friday to spend some quality time with my mom because she is going to be having surgery in December and I just wanted to hangout with her before that. Turns out she was called into a meeting early after her appointment so I didnt get to see much of her. But since I had already scheduled the day off I instead spent some quality time with one of my best girlfriends Lola. We met 2yrs ago at Starbucks, she was the first person to talk to me when I started working at her store and we have been friends ever since. We are so different from eachother but we complete eachother so its ok. Iam the wild crazy loud and out going one who is a freelance makeup artist and she is the more subdued, quiet, goofey one thats a freelance hairdresser. We are team awesome!!! We have been through so much and last December was probably the best year for us and since then our friendship has gotten stronger. I love this girl she truly is what a best friend should be. She has always been there for me though everything with her love, guidance and advice. Without her I would be so lost.

So We both took the day off and went on an adventure...

To us this consisted of a wonderful pedicure at a cute little spa that she loves in Atascosita
Then we went and had lunch at Mamongs which is a really cool Vietnamese restaurant in the gayborhood
Then after everything we went shopping at the Galleria.
We bought eachother cute friendship bracelets at Urban Outfitters and then we parted ways.

We were on a time crunch because I had to get home to cook for my wonderful boyfriend because his birthday was the next day and she had to get back to her side of town to go and pick up her little girl.
We always have a lot of fun no matter what we end up doing. I love you Lola!!! 

Hopefully I get to spend some quality time with my mom before her surgery and where I dont have to take a day off from work because I dont know how thats going to work out!!!

Friday, November 19, 2010

Midnight Showings

So Iam a huge huge fan of midnight showings... I love being a night owl and getting to watch movies the night before their premier. I usually go with one of my friends who will remain nameless but this person has entered hermit state for awhile, actually for the last couple of months so I was considering flying solo to see the new Harry Potter movie.
When I told my mom what was up she automatically told me she wanted to go with me so I was like HIP- HIP- HOORAY I have a date with my mommy!!! I love this woman she is one of my bestfriends and I hardly get to see her since I moved out on my own so I was stoked.

I got home from work and Mark asks me what the plan for the night was and I told him and he wanted to go with us too so I was even more excited, the two people I love the most in one night yaaaaaaaaay!!!

So he took my mom and I to dinner at one of my favorite mexican restaurants called Guadalajara which he likes to call Gaydalajara because pretty much all of the waiters are gay. I love this about the restaurant plus the food is dlish and AND the margaritas are amazing and fully loaded!!!
Anyways after all of this we went to the midnight showing of Harry Potter and it was AWESOME!!! Got to love the cute gingers... Ron Weasley(Rupert Grint) and Mark Belle I love you guys ha ha ha If only they knew what a turn on their red hair is Gingers are SEXAY!!!
Mark Belle

Ron Weasley (Rupert Grint) Mmmm Ginger goodness

Thursday, November 4, 2010

Im not scared of the dark, Im scared of whats in the dark.

Ok so I’m sitting here in the office bored to death so I figured I could work on my blog. So as of today Mark (the love of my life) has been gone for a month and I miss him so much. He is in the oil construction field so he usually has to travel a lot. Right now he is in Oklahoma while Iam stuck in my ordinary little office job in the Spring Branch are of Houston, Texas as a receptionist for a landscaping company. I just want him home as soon as possible and I think I still have to wait 12 more days till he comes home. Let the countdown for his arrival begin now. Im really hoping that he gets home earlier than that and just surprises me at my office *wishful thinking*
Well one of the reasons I want him home so bad is because I just moved into my very own apartment at least 45 mins away from my parents house. I’ve never lived alone so this is a big scary change for me. I live in a pretty good neighborhood I’m like 5 mins away from Montrose (the GAYborhood in Houston) and the area I live in has pretty much college kids and people my age so I enjoy it. I guess the problem for me is that a lot of creepy things have been happening to me lately.
Ok well let me give you the background… ever since I was 15 I started seeing things and experiencing really creepy things. I lived with my parents and I was going through my “Goth” phase so I boarded up my window and kept it super dark in my room all the time. I also had a bunch of voodoo dolls and creepy “goth” dolls, dolls without eyes, dolls that were dead and came with death certificates everything morbid I had and displayed in my room. Ok so knowing that with all the darkness there really wouldn’t be any shadow castings anywhere in my room but I would always see things, figures of people in my room. I started to become afraid of sleeping in my own room because I would see a figure of a really tall man always standing at the edge of my bed watching me sleep, he would walk around the room but in the end always ended up at the end of my bed. There was also another one I would see he was shorter and over weight and he stayed closer to the door of my room. I know I sound crazy but ITS TRUE! I started sleeping with an eye mask because I thought I was imagining things and I didn’t want my family to think I was crazy so I blocked it out for a couple of weeks with a sleeping mask. Then the whispering started. I was laying down about to fall asleep when I heard people talking in my room, I thought my mom was in my room so I took off the mask and sat up but I was alone. I tried to go back to sleep but it was closer to my ear then and I couldn’t understand it, it was louder and very fast and it sounded like gibberish and this went on for some time. I started sleeping in the living room because I couldn’t handle my room anymore but I didn’t want my parents to think I was a chicken and I was scared of the dark. So then like a month went by and it was the day before my birthday and I was on the phone with a friend and when I hung up I was laying down and I  got up to turn off the light and then laid back down. I was about to fall asleep when I heard a book fall from my book case, so of course I get up and turn on the light but there was nothing on the floor everything was in its proper place. So I laid back down then I hear it again and as Im going to get up I can’t freaking move. I feel this awful pressure on my chest and I can’t breath and something is holding me down. My eyes were wide open and I saw nothing, I tried to scream and yell but nothing came out, I tried to breathe but something was suffocating me I felt like I was going to pass out I couldn’t handle it anymore and I was giving up but then I started praying in my head the “Our Father” and it all stopped before I could even finish the prayer. I could move again as soon as I realized this I ran to the freaking door and I tried to open it but it wouldn’t open and I cant lock my door so I started freaking out and crying and praying as loud as I could through the sobs and it worked I was free. I’m not a catholic and I really don’t feel like I belong to any particular religion but I was brought up Catholic and those prayers are what helped me at that moment. The next day the boards came down so I could have some sunlight and everything that I thought had a negative feel to it went in a box and into the attic. After that big incident other creepy things that I wont get into happened but very sporadically until now.
Now that I moved into my new place I completely forgot about all the weird crap from the past and its happening all over again. I feel scared all the time, I hear things, I see the shadows everywhere not just in my apartment. I see them in the office and that’s what scares me because whatever it is it wants my attention and ignoring it just pisses it off and now it’s getting louder.
Things that have happened are super creepy! I don’t like to talk about them but I think I need to talk to a psychic, and get my house cleansed because Iam so scared now. A Wiccan friend of mine tells me to see it as a gift and try to help those that are trying to reach out to me, but I just want to live in peace and be happy I want things to go back to being normal where I don’t feel like Im losing my mind and Im not scared of the dark or whats lurking in there.