Wednesday, August 10, 2011

What is love?

Morning everyone!!!

Yesterday was such a weird day for me. I kind of just didnt do much of anything, it felt really great. I have been on this healthy eating kick and I have been doing really good, Im trying my hardest to get out of the 200 zone and I feel that when I do things will get easier onmy weight loss journey. Last night I just felt so lazy, I really didnt feel like cooking anything so I opted for a salad and a pop tart for dessert. I had every intention of going to work out but something happened...
I was on the phone with Muffin smoking a cigarette outside (my 1st cigarette in 2 days) and I got an incredible cigarette high, I felt like I was seriously drunk or something. I went inside laid down on the couch and was watching Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, when I just passed out. I got a call from Muffin at around 2 in the morning and I had no clue where I was or what the hell happened? What happened to me? Did the pop tart send me on some weird glutten coma? Was my cigarrete laced? Did waffle put sleep aide in my crystal light? I dont know it could be any of thse but when I woke up I was so disappointed that I didnt get to work out. Today will be a different story!!!

Im so happy today, I dont know how but all of the problems that I have been having recently have just settled themselves. I mean I did have to talk them out and resolve them a bit, and I did ask some good friends for their opinions on the situations so I did have to work a little bit but today I just feel so free. It might be because Im listening to my good mood mix but I feel great. There are somethings that will never go away but I just have to ignore them for now because in the longrun I will not have them in my life. Yesterday I spent most of my time thinking about my wedding to Muffin, thinking about who I really want to invite, thinking about the look and feel of the whole thing and then just thinking about how much I really do love Mark. There have been times within this past year of us being together where I have thought that I was making a wrong choice in loving him, that the distance of him being gone was not going to work for me and that I couldnt handle not being around him all the time but a whole year has gone by and I just know that I love this man with all my heart and soul and I wish he could see the how beautiful and meaningful he is to me. Mark is one of my best friends, he is my partner in crime, he is my lover and he is my life there is nothing more that I want than to spend the rest of my life with him. Hopefully as this year goes by our relationship grows stronger, and our personalities mature. I need him to be more understanding of who Iam, less jealous, less angry and less of a hot head. I wish he could see the world the way I see it, I find beauty in so many things and it takes a lot to bring me down, he needs to free himself of his mental slavery and just be a free spirit like me.

I was browsing someones tumblr looking for more cute small intimate wedding ideas when I came accross this and it just made my heart faint!!!

It was a grade schoolers answer to the questions what is love? how do you know when you are in love or when someone loves you?

"When someone loves you, the way they say your name is different. You just know that your name is safe in their mouth" - Billy age 4

"Love is when you go ut to eat and give somebody most of your french fries without making them give you any of theirs" - Chrissy age 6

"Love is what makes you smile when you are tired" - Terri age 4

"Love is when mommy makes coffee for daddy and she takes a sip before giving it to him, to make sure that it tastes ok" - Danny age 7

"Love is when you tell a boy you like his shirt and then he wears it everyday" - Noelle age 7

"Love is when mommy sees daddy smelly and sweaty and still says he is hondsomer than Brad Pitt" - Chris age 7

"Love is when my grandmother got arthritis, she couldnt bend over and paint her toenails anymore, so my grandfather does it for her all the time. Even when his hands got arthritis too he just loves her that much" - Rebecca age 8

"When you love somebody, your eyelashes go up and down and little stars come out of you" - Karen age 7

It just amazes me how much children know, I cant wait to have one someday!!!

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